


I'll Crawl Home to Her

by sartiebodyshots



Category: Falling Skies
Genre: Gen, vaguely suicidal thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-04-27
Packaged: 2018-03-26 01:48:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3832513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sartiebodyshots/pseuds/sartiebodyshots
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Tom loses everything, he comes home to rest.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Crawl Home to Her

            “Where are they?!” Tom screams at every person he sees.  “Where are they?!”

            Nobody has an answer and Tom stares at the aftermath of the explosion, willing to see Ben carrying Hal and Matt out somehow.  Willing to see something that indicates that at least one of his kids is still alive.  The flames dim and so does something inside Tom. 

There’s nothing left anymore. 

They’re not coming out of that explosion. They were sleeping in their beds.  This was supposed to be a safe place.  His kids weren’t on guard.  They were resting comfortably for the first time in far too long before the explosion consumed them.

Tom doesn’t look at anyone as he finds his pack, thrown aside when he heard the beamers overhead.  Then he turns North.  Towards home.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Weaver asks, voice softer than Tom has ever heard it, softer than when Weaver had tried to comfort his boys any number of times.

“Home,” Tom says, not looking at him.  “Don’t try to stop me.”

“You were a good soldier,” Weaver says, clasping him on the arm.  “A good second in command.  A decent president, too.  Most importantly, you were a good father.”

Tom’s not a father anymore.  There’s no point in being any of those things if he’s not a father.

He doesn’t want to exist anymore, he wants to end his suddenly pointless existence, but most of all, he wants to go home.  Home is almost a thousand miles away.  It’s going to be a long walk.

He thinks about _home_.  He thinks about what he used to find when he came home- arguments, games, all kinds of things.  He thinks about Rebecca’s laugh warming him up on a cold winter night.  He thinks about practicing lacrosse in the yard with Hal, how they would hang out with Ben after and watch Star Trek with him.  He thinks about Matt learning how to walk and crawl and his absolute delight at having four, happy human playgrounds to climb on.  He thinks about home.

Tom talks as little as he can as he makes his way home.  He avoids anyone with kids who even kind of look like his own did.  He avoids anyone with kids with spikes, which isn’t fair, but it reminds him too much of Ben.

He drops asleep in bushes and on the sides of roads when his feet and legs hurt too much to keep going.  There’s not much in the way of water or food, but he can still scrounge just enough to take him one more step, one more day.  He’s not going to live long.

Tom doesn’t run into the Espheni (of course he doesn’t.  They had been so close to kicking them off the planet, another few months and they’d be safe again.  Real safe, not the fake safe that took his kids from him).  Maybe all of the people he’s lost, all of the people he’s failed, are watching over him.  Maybe there is something else, after this. 

Things begin to look familiar.  This is the route they took out camping those few times.  (This is near where they fled to after they laid Rebecca to rest)  This is where his first apartment was (now it’s a crater).  This is the road where Hal parallel parked for the first time.  This is where he used to take Rebecca out to dinner when he really wanted to impress her.  This is where they took Matt for swim lessons.  This is where Ben tried and failed to learn to ride a bike.  This is where he and Rebecca made their family.  Their most precious family.

Home is still standing when he reaches it.  The door is wide open, inviting him in.  Tom’s feet feel heavier than ever when he walks up the front sidewalk.

Home is empty of all the things he imagined.  There is no laughter, no sports, no Star Trek, no happiness in this house anymore. 

They kept their family photo albums in a tiny closet that nobody has touched.  He flips through them, finding a picture of them all together.  They had been so happy.  Ben’s team had just won the quizbowl championship and everyone was so happy for him.  Hal’s arm is wrapped tight around Ben and Matt is standing between them, giving a thumbs up to the camera.  Somehow Rebecca manages to hold all three of them at once in her outstretched arms and Tom stands beside her, one hand on Rebecca’s back, the other on Ben’s shoulder.  Everyone’s smiles are so wide as Ben holds his trophy.

Tom takes the picture out of the sleeve.  He wants it with him for the rest of his short life, wants the reminder of happiness.  He checks around back, just to make sure.  Maybe, just maybe, they were all outside to play.  Maybe this has been the most horrible dream.  Maybe he’ll tell everyone and they’ll laugh at him for his overactive imagination and give him a hug.

There is nothing out there.

He kicks off his boots; Rebecca hated it when he tracked mud around the house.  He takes off his jacket, making sure to hang it on the hook; Matt would rifle through coat pockets that were just tossed aside.  He shuts and locks the doors; Tom had always done that before bed, double checking just in case.

He climbs up the stairs, feet cement.  By now he feels so exhausted that he could drop right here, but he doesn’t.  Tom is almost where he needs to be

The last time he had been there, he had seen Rebecca and she had told him to leave, that there was nothing left for him here.  (It had been untrue.  Rebecca had been there) Now, there’s nothing left for him anywhere.  So he came back to her and he prays she isn’t alone.

“I’m sorry,” he croaks out as he lays on his side again, not sure if she’s here or if she can hear him.  But he needs to apologize.  He failed in the most important duty.  Their kids are dead, oh god, they’re all dead.

“Oh, Tom,” Tom blinks and suddenly, Rebecca is there.  Her hands are on his face, stroking gently.  “It’s okay.  You’re here, with us.  We’re all going to be together again.”

 “Us?” Tom says.

“Of course.  We’re all here with you, Tom,” Rebecca says, pushing him onto his back. 

Tom blinks again and his boys are all standing at his bedside.  Tears well up in his eyes; they’re here.  They’re here.  His boys are here.

“Don’t cry, Dad,” Ben says, brushing the tears away.  “We love you.”

“Yeah, Dad,” Hal says.  “We’re going to have our whole family together again.  It’ll be like the old days.”

“I missed Mom and you,” Matt says, crawling into Tom’s lap.

Rebecca’s head is resting on Tom’s shoulder and she reaches up to nudge Matt.  “I missed you too, Matt, but everything is okay now.” 

“We’re all home, Dad,” Ben says.

“Come home to me, Tom Mason.  Come home,” Rebecca murmurs. 

Tom breathes out and his fight ends.


End file.
